Vulval Cancer: Together By Matthew Baumhauer

It was March 2016 as I watched my wife walking down the stairs in hospital crying in pain after having some biopsy’s and just new we were in for a very difficult time.
Another appointment later and our worst fears were confirmed. My wife has Vulval Cancer. I felt, scared, sad and kinda helpless as I couldn't do or say anything that would make my wife feel better. I needed to be strong and confidentfor my wife (although I felt like breaking down in tears), telling her we’ll get through this together, all will be fine.
What I wasn’t prepared for was the trauma my wife had to endure and the consequences of the surgery to remove the tumour. The devastation endured through 58 sessions of radiotherapy, further hospital admissions due to cellulitis and lymph node removal, has been very tough to bear, and am so proud of how remarkable my wife has been during all this treatment. Never complained, never moaned and even in the greatest of pain has put on a brave face and soldiered on.
My wife is now having to endure the after effects from having cancer, the onset of the menopause brought on by the radiotherapy, lymphedema due to the radiotherapy and the constant pain in her leg and groin due to the operations she has had done.
The list is not exhaustive, but we will deal with each step as it comes. We are both very angry about the lack of awareness of this little known cancer, and Lichen Sclerosus, all the misdiagnoses by GP’s in particular and my wife has fought tirelessly everyday to raise as much awareness as possible, talking to the press, liaising with the Eve Appeal, using Social Media as a platform to shout loud and proud to the public about Vulval Cancer. My wife has had many messages of thanks and many going to see there GP’s and getting diagnosed earlier.
For me, our lives have changed forever. I have cried, I feel sadness often when I see how much pain my wife is in, I miss the intimacy, but, I love my wife with all my heart and even though life will never be the same pre-cancer, I’m lucky we still have each other. When we got married in 2006 we made a vow, in ‘sickness and in health’. Together we’re stronger, together we will fight this and together we will never let cancer take over our lives.